When I Survey
April 4th, 2007
Easter is THE most important holiday in Christianity. What Jesus did on the cross for us is too beautiful and perfect and painful to even think about sometimes. This was written by my dear friend Mindy Lenahan today as we contemplate the Easter season. You may be asking what this has to do with PPD. It has everything to do the faith I clung to when I was in the dark valley of postpartum depression. Read on. I know you will be as blessed as I was when I read it.
The Wonderful Cross
By Chris Tomlin (chorus) and Isaac Watts
When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of Glory died
My richest gain I count but loss
And pour contempt on all my pride
On which the Prince of Glory died
My richest gain I count but loss
And pour contempt on all my pride
See from his head, his hands, his feet
Sorrow and love flow mingled down
Did ever such love and sorrow meet
Or thorns compose so rich a crown
Sorrow and love flow mingled down
Did ever such love and sorrow meet
Or thorns compose so rich a crown
O the wonderful cross, O the wonderful cross
Bids me come and die and find that I may truly live
O the wonderful cross, O the wonderful cross
All who gather here by grace draw near and bless
Your name
Bids me come and die and find that I may truly live
O the wonderful cross, O the wonderful cross
All who gather here by grace draw near and bless
Your name
Were the whole realm of nature mine
That were an offering far too small
Love so amazing, so divine
Demands my soul, my life, my all
That were an offering far too small
Love so amazing, so divine
Demands my soul, my life, my all
About the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?” which means, “My God, my God why have your forsaken me?” Matthew 27:46
What a heart wrenching cry! It breaks my heart just to think of it. My Lord, spotless Lamb, bloody and nailed to a cross feels the weight of my sin from deep inside Him. As His blood covers me now, my sin covered Him then. It seeped into every part of Him. He was filthy. He had taken off His royal robe. He had traded places with me. His Father could not even look at Him. For the first time Jesus feels the separation that comes from sin and from Him pours the cry of a sinner, not a saint. “My God, my God why have your forsaken me?” He addresses His Heavenly Father, whom He knows more intimately than any other as “God”. When God looks down at me, Jesus stands in the way…He doesn’t see me, He sees Jesus in all His perfection. At that moment when God looked at Jesus, He didn’t see His Son, He saw me…and He turned away. Jesus endured the betrayal and He didn’t cry out, through the beatings He remained silent. The nails were driven into His hands and His feet and not a word is recorded from Him. But when God turned His back? That is too much! He can not remain silent when He feels the separation. God’s presence has led Him through His ministry, has led Him up to this moment and now it is gone. I cannot fathom the depth of His pain. Because of Him, I don’t have to ever feel that kind of separation. Praise God! Praise God!
“And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom.” Matthew 27:51
I picture God bursting out of His dwelling place. How He had longed to dwell IN us. And now it was finished…atonement had been made and a holy God could live in His people. He no longer needed to be hid behind a curtain; we no longer needed Him to either. The thick veil that could not be torn apart by oxen was split from top to bottom. It had served to protect the holy place, from sin and it served to protect the sinful people from God’s presence. On that side of the cross, we were unprepared to see God’s glory. But Praise God, Jesus changed all that. He finished His work, and I can stand in God’s presence. Praise God! Praise God!
Praise God! Praise God!
What other words are needed at the foot of the cross?
-Mindy Lenahan, April 4, 2007